Ancient proverb say...

...so get ready for some deep thoughts with life changing wisdom. Not really.

So I'm watching t.v. (I can hear you...yes I watch a lot of television, but just specific shows, thank you very much) and the character mentioned a ancient proverb of two monks who were walking down the road. They came across a woman who needed help crossing a stream. The first monk picked the woman up and carried her across the stream and she thanked him. The monks continued on their journey, but the second monk was very angry. Soon he told the first monk his thoughts. "You broke the rules of the order when you carried that woman across the stream." The first monk simply looked at the second one and said. "I only carried the woman for the short distance across the stream. You have been carrying her ever since."

I carry grudges and tend to put expectations on people. I think this little story talks to me more than I care to admit. I'm the second monk. Using all my energy to be angry. I have been angry for several years now and couldn't tell you what the hell I'm angry about and don't even know who I would tell. That's one of the problems of carrying around anger. Every bit of your energy is used in keeping the anger going and you don't have any energy to remember what you are angry about.

I getting tired of carrying this "old woman" around.

Ode to the Pedestal

I was watching television the other night (actually it was the same night, so stop sighing) and the character on the show was talking about how hard it is when you discover your parents aren't what you perceived them to be. I have some connection to this observation.

I would like to tell myself that I had no illusions about my parents, but that wouldn't be true. I guess that I'm lucky in a way. I didn't have my illusions burst until I was much older. I have worked with many children who found out the unfortunate truth that their parent aren't perfect all to early in life. I would have hated to have my ideas about my parents blow to pieces at such a young age.

We put our parents, grandparents, etc., on pedestals that they can't stay on and then get upset with them when they fall off. Notice I said "we", meaning me. I so often want our parents to be superhuman and cry when they turn out to be simply human.

I thought I had stopped having expectations of people, stopped putting them on pedestals, but I haven't. I think it's human nature to want people to be perfect as much as it's human nature to be imperfect. The purpose should not be to put people on pedestal, but to encourage them to climb up themselves.